Sign with the phrase "Success is Supposed to Be Hard" on a green background.

Journal Entry: 20 MAY 2019 at 08:10 (Judgement)

@ Starbucks in Kaiserslautern because it’s dope that they finally have one.

I’m in a negative funk for no reason this morning. Maybe it’s the pressure of being an entrepreneur and not yet getting the results I desire. Maybe it’s from not feeling appreciated despite my best efforts. Maybe I’m just not being grateful. I’m better than that. Last week I was looking at a letter stating that my water would be shut off today for non-payment. On Friday, I gladly paid it with no problem at all. I AM BLESSED and must keep that in mind at all times.

A noble and honorable man would never be so critical of his own family the way I am. I AM better than that. There’s a line in A Course in Miracles that addresses judgement of others. It says something to the effect of: “You have no idea how beautiful the world is once you stop judging others completely.” I aspire to that. I want to meet everyone as my equal (knowledge over perception). I can and will do so.

A related struggle is that I’m not sure how to navigate the balance between becoming massively successful and meeting everyone as my equal. Should I continue not engaging with broke people, or am I depriving them of an opportunity to learn and aspire to something better? What lessons am I missing out on from them? I’m still learning, and perhaps A Course in Miracles holds many of the answers I need. I’m here to be great, and that begins within myself. My wife and daughters should be the first to benefit from my growth. It must be LOVE and PATIENCE at ALL times. I appreciate them to no end!

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C. Duayne Pearson monochrome mirror self-portrait with Canon AE-1 Program 35mm camera

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